Where We Are Found

Isaac has this thing where he feels like he needs my company any time he has to pee between the hours of midnight and 6 A.M.

Which is inconvenient, because every once in a while I try to sleep between those hours. This morning I was coming out of the bathroom a little before six, freshly shaved and showered, wearing my navy business suit on account of needing to bring some smack today, and there he stood in the bedroom doorway, like a little haunt. Frankly, he scared the bejeesus out of me, but when you’re wearing your smack-bringing business suit, you have to play it cool.

So I picked him up, and he pressed his warm chubby cheek against my neck, and I carried him to his bathroom. There we enacted our usual routine, in which he leans back against my legs and tries to fall asleep in mid-pee, and I try to keep him pointed at the interior part of the toilet.

I don’t care how nice your suit is, there’s just no looking cool in that situation.

Afterward, I carried him to his bed, and tucked him back in. He told me goodnight, even though daylight was beginning to whisper its arrival. Little stinker.

Every night before I put him to bed, I fuss at him not to wake me up. But part of me, the part that has given up on foolish ideals like world peace and a good night’s sleep, is glad that he searches me out in the dark hours. I doubt he even remembers these times, but I like to think that some part of him will remember that when he needed me in the darkness, I was there.


  1. Gary Sweeten

    The smell of a kid asleep with warm cheeks and tousled hair is worth all the rumpled suits and early morning pee times.

    Great memories from long ago.

  2. Lucy

    Actually, you probably looked way cool in that situation.

    I’ve also heard rumors that its really cool when a guy does housework …

  3. Max D.

    Tony, I love your stuff. It’s especially relevant because my boy is 11 months and a little crawling dynamo, and I’m still trying to figure out MY manhood and now I have to direct his. To that end, I just finished reading your book(let) a little while ago, and tomorrow I’ll send another copy to my brother (girl, boy, girl).


  4. J Ponzi

    Why are you so damn good at making me cry . . .? I love that. My little guy almost always wakes me up around 3 or 4 in the morning needing a hug. This really means that he wants to crawl in bed with me and snuggle for the last couple hours of the “night” before the ritual of “Hurry up! Get Dressed! Get your book-bag! Where’s your OTHER shoe?!” begins. Thank God he does that. Otherwise, life would sometimes seem like one long rant.

Comments are closed.